Discussion: What I Have Learned On This Journey!
- Belinda Lane
- Mar 31, 2023
- 7 min read
By: Belinda M. Lane
This is my last Blog!
Friday at Sundown was born in May 2020. The pandemic had blanketed the world. I wanted a voice during this time and in discussing this, Friday at Sundown was born. In all honesty I thought it was going to be for a year at the most. God had other plans. I have enjoyed this period in my life, more than I could have imagined. I also posted to Facebook and LinkedIn. The Comments, Likes and Shares blessed me tremendously. I have supporters who have been with me since the start of this journey and I’m so appreciative. I have been blessed to have a book coming out in April 2023 and will be on Amazon. Your continuous support will be greatly appreciated. Again, Thank You!
My Book: Standing On The Edge Of Your Tomorrow
(An Introspection Into Your Soul)
March 31, 2023
What people think of you is their own business, not yours or your label.
What we think of others is our business and not theirs or their label.
There are lessons I have absorbed over the years, but many have become clearer over the past three (3) years. Some of the learning experiences have touched my heart with joy. Other experiences have (as the expression goes) broken my heart. To repair or cure the breach in my soul was an understanding of myself and what God wanted from me. Simply put, God wanted me to know how to operate in love no matter what happened. He pulled the covers off of me and things around me. This allowed me to see myself as he saw me and what the brokenness within me had created. Especially for those I loved deeply.
It was my thoughts and feelings in relationship to them that was concerning. In short, my perspective of the person (s). We appreciate or value someone for many reasons and sometimes our reasons are similar between each individual and sometimes they are not. A change occurs within the relationship; it can generate “an out-of-balance space”. The out of balanced space will always have emotions to fill it. I think of individuals who we put on a pedestal within our relationship (s). Not because they told us to, but for whatever reason we did. Then when a change comes into the relationship, creating the out-of-balance space, our view of them changes. Usually, the outcome is not positive.
New thoughts and feelings occur. The change can bring the relationship to an end or begin a new direction that both can agree on. If we pause and consider this topic, it usually brings pain to people, because someone didn't meet your expectations. This is completely unfair to the other person. I thought about this. I accepted that we all change and some changes will create different outcomes. It is important is how we part, when following our distinctive path or they on theirs. Our separations often end in anger and misunderstandings coupled with ill wishes?
Lesson l Learned: We are all human. Our backgrounds in life will make us view situations diversely concerning the same subject. The process will sometimes bring us closer together or may divide us. Choose to carry the positive, and know that anything else was only a detour. No man is your enemy unless you perceive him to be. An alternative path will require your full attention inward and outward for the continuation of your journey.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 New International Version: There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens:
Since the beginnng of 2023 we have experienced what seems to be an overlapping of seasons. The first day of Spring the morning temperature was 27 degrees, where I live. The past several nights, the temperature has been as low as in the 20s and some nights a few days later, the night temperature was 60 degrees. Each season always brings with it a change of our wardrobe. We go from heavy coats to short sleeve shirts and from boots to sandals.
Our lives have seasons, which it can be incredibly confusing at times and what our “attire” should be. And what it is necessary to let go. I spoke about in past conversations of how difficult it was for me to pay heed to the seasons in my own life. We must remember the transformation of “attire” for us is within. Our mind, ideas, perspectives, form an understanding to fit the changes of our seasons. The times we must hold on and fight and when it’s time for us to let go. Regardless if it is our favorite, we respect the season and we should dress accordingly. We can find ourselves sick and at the doctor’s office, being given a prescription, just because we inappropriately dressed. Many will fight through the sickness with home remedies and rest.
Lesson l Learned: To pay attention to my life. Distractions should not take me away from what I can control. I’m learning with a plan, to stop and process things within my control. Once completing my part (in the boundaries of love, as much as I can), I entrust to God his part. I’ve learned to take time for myself… relax, refresh and replenish myself. No one can take care of you, like you can and they are not supposed to… our self-care is our responsibility. Life will have difficulties and it’s important we learn what inner “attire” to wear during those times.
Vengeance is mine said the Lord (Romans 12:19-21)
I feel the need to discuss this matter of concerning this scripture because I have heard it a lot over the past few years. This was mainly from Christians who accept that someone has hurt them. I think I have come to a clearer understanding of this scripture. I can’t accept this as a “you get them God” statement against a person or perceived enemy. God perceives the complete picture of all parties involved. This scripture leaves us out of the process for reasons. The distress we experience inflicted on us can be authentic or a misinterpretation we uncover about months/years later.
Vengeance is when someone inflicts punishment in retaliation for an injury or offense, retribution. Paying them back for their action against you it will take you away from love. Your choices will take you out of the will of God. To act against the will of God, we are vulnerable and become a target to the enemy of our soul. This adversary doesn’t care how he gets you and will try to ruin you, while you believe you are justified in retaliating what happened to you. You must examine the seeds you are planting of hurt, pain and making sure someone is getting what we think they deserve. God has said in every circumstance to remain in LOVE!
I believe God would illustrate more to us, but he knows the feelings/emotions we would attach to what we uncover or experience would be devastating. And because of this he will not. We must remember the ones who purposely hurt us and desired harm against us, having planted those seeds in their own life garden. They will reap their harvest, without our input.
Lesson l Learned: God is in charge. The negative energy it would require from me towards someone else would be seeds I'm sowing in my garden to come up in my future.
We have God’s promise to us in scriptures to live by: We are given scriptures to live by:
Galatians 6:9 New International Version… Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up
Mathew 11:28 New American Standard Bible… “Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
In closing and my final words of encouragement as we briefly looking at the life of Joseph.
Sold by his brothers:
Genesis 37:26 Judah said to his brothers, “What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover up his blood? 27 Come, let’s sell him to the Ishmaelites and not lay our hands on him; after all, he is our brother, our own flesh and blood.” His brothers agreed.
In the Master’s House who bought him:
New King James Version… Genesis 39:2 he Lord was with Joseph so that he prospered, and he lived in the house of his Egyptian master
Falsely accused by his master's wife:
Genesis 39:10 And though she spoke to Joseph day after day, he refused to go to bed with her or even be with her.
Genesis 39:20 So Joseph’s master took him and had him thrown into the prison where the king’s prisoners were confined. (Joseph staying in the will of God concerning his master wife was still thrown into prison)
Genesis 39:21 New Living Translation But the LORD was with Joseph in the prison and showed him his faithful love. And the LORD made Joseph a favorite with the prison warden.
The Wait:
Genesis 40:23 The chief cupbearer, however, did not remember Joseph; he forgot him.
Genesis 41:1 When two full years had passed,
Genesis 41:14 So Pharaoh sent for Joseph, and he was quickly brought from the dungeon. When he had shaved and changed his clothes, he came before Pharaoh.
God’s fulfillment:
Genesis 41:41 So Pharaoh said to Joseph, “I hereby put you in charge of the whole land of Egypt.
What is it taking for you to get to your next level? I can only imagine as ones looking at Joseph life, a person would draw negative conclusions. In every area of Joseph’s life and being sold by family. Or being falsely accused (while staying in God’s will) and being thrown in to prison. Not to forget being forgotten for two (2) years before being released. Yet in all these situation God was with him as God was moving him to his next levels. Remember, wherever you are in life…God is with you!
(Disclaimer: We do not own the rights to the motivational speech in this video)
(Disclaimer: We do not own the rights to the motivational speech in this video)
(Disclaimer: We do not own the rights to the music in this video
Thank you for joining me for Friday at Sundown. Remember… Just Breathe!
Resources
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Dial 988
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you
800-273-8255
Domestic Violence
National Domestic Violence Hotline can help victims, survivors of domestic violence. Call 1-800-799-7233. Chat w/an advocate on our website. National Domestic Violence Hotline: www.thehotline.org/
Aid for Military Veterans
In an attempt to cope with the pain of overwhelming emotions, sometimes veterans turn to unhealthy relationships, at-risk behaviors, or substance abuse.
Welcome Home is Celebrate Recovery's (CR) tool to help veterans stuck in hurts, hang-ups, and habits. (These statements are from CR’s Homepage). You are not alone! https://www.welcomehome.celebraterecovery.com
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