The Patterns of Life

July 18, 2025 Belinda M. Lane

As a child, I have memories of my mother, who could have been considered a Seamstress. I remember her meticulously, placing the desired dress pattern on her chosen material. In those days you would purchase patterns for clothing you could sew yourself.  On the front of each was an illustration of what the finished product would look like. Intrigued with the process, I observed each and every move. She would change a little bit and a little bit there. The packaging’s image of the material didn’t always exactly match due to the actual material my mother had purchased. Additionally, in contrast to the packaging, my mother’s creations included her own unique flare of design and color. When the dress was finally done, she would step out in it, privately proud of her work.

Reflecting on that childhood memory made me contemplate our lives. Like the dress pattern, we get a picture when we look in the mirror of our outer self. In retrospect, the picture’s composition also reveals aspects of our inner selves. Inside us, exists a complex mix of positive and negative emotions, including joy, pain, love, hate, laughter, tears, triumphs, and traumas. When we contemplate the image of who we strive to become, what aspects form the finished individual? What shaped the paths our lives have taken? Specially based on the adult we cut from the pattern.

Imagine your inner and outer selves standing side-by-side. Admittedly, would they be able to recognize each other? To put it simply, if someone compared your inner and outer selves, would they see identical twins or fraternal twins?

Consider the possibility of a factory worker incorrectly assembling a package, either by missing a part or including an incorrect one. The dressmaker, if determined to finish the dress despite the mix-up, would have to improvise. Now, let’s compare our conscious and subconscious minds.  

Our subconscious mind and conscious mind pattern pieces will look different when laid out. Consciousness is the part of our mind that is aware of our thoughts, actions, and environment. Subconscious is the part of our mind that controls our reactions and behaviors without us being aware of it. (Per https://www.positive-psychologist.com/).

Have you ever felt like, “I don’t understand my behavior; this isn’t the person I want to be?” or "I simply cannot help myself!" 

We have just completed (the first) six months of this year of 2025. Many have stopped making New Year’s Resolutions. Which for some means they continue with their old habits, self-doubt, laziness and their past behaviors still dominating. The familiarity comforts us, never challenging us to change.

Each year as we become a year older, outwardly our body shows the progressing stage of our life. For some, the inner child is still ruling, fighting to remain in charge. Whereas, others settle in the comfort of mediocrity, doing things as we always have done. Sameness!

Honestly, think about this:

Note the changes observed to this point in the past six (6) months…

• Using a 1-4 scale, please assess any positive advancements you’ve observed. (1-None 2-A little 3-Some 4-Progress)

• Concentrate on one life aspect and look for repeated patterns.

• Identify a meaningful aim, then determine why (disregarding financial aspects) you haven’t accomplished it.

• Identify what’s hindering your goal attainment.

(a) Distractions (b) Time Management (c) Lack of Planning 

Keep in mind that seeds begin their lives in darkness, hidden beneath the earth. Here, its roots grow out of sight. It then presses again the dirt finally breaking through to the surface, and the light. Visible now, the seed continued its journey to fulfill its destiny. The seed never accused the Sower, the conditions, or the time it needed to bloom. The seed continues to grow.

For more info:  https://academyofthewinds.org/blog/the-unconscious-mind-information-is-absorbed-and-forms-the-brain

  Thank you for joining me for Friday at Sundown. Remember… Just Breathe!

Resources:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Dial 988

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you

800-273-8255

Domestic Violence

National Domestic Violence Hotline can help victims, survivors of domestic violence. Call 1-800-799-7233. Chat w/an advocate on our website. National Domestic Violence Hotline: www.thehotline.org/ 

Aid for Military Veterans

In an attempt to cope with the pain of overwhelming emotions, sometimes veterans turn to unhealthy relationships, at-risk behaviors, or substance abuse.

Welcome Home is Celebrate Recovery's (CR) tool to help veterans stuck in hurts, hang-ups, and habits. (These statements are from CR’s Homepage). You are not alone.