Discussion: Do You Know What Season You Are In?
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September 25, 2020
I wished to address the Seasons of our Life for this week’s discussion. And what a better time to do it with than the change of fall, which is just arriving? After “googling” pertinent information, as it was my intent to share and be accurate as possible with the message. I was caught off guard momentarily as a wave of depression swept over me. Seriously, for a moment longer than I wanted I had a sense of depression that manifested out of nowhere. For many years in my past I recall how depression stood in front of me with its arms wide open. I would melt into those arms of depression, and would be held so tight that I felt as if I couldn’t breathe.
One fact you need to realize is Depression is the manager of an extensive family. The family is comprised of, “The Twins: Anxiety and Panic attacks, Big Brother: Migraine headaches, and little sister: Self-imposed isolation. And when they are done with you the most mundane of functions seems to be monumental tasks. There is even the inability to dress for a special occasion or to just be among household members. The most fatal of these family members is Suicide or his other nickname Suicide Attempts. During moments where I had occurrences of this later in life I developed an 'emergency pack’ to grant me instant support.
Fighting years of depression in my past and I mean fighting to get through, I can testify that you don’t have to live like that. My emergency equipment included prayer, but I remember there were times my inner self felt squeezed so tight that barely any sound came out of my mouth. Mentally, you are in what feels like an unending fog. From me it is music that takes up the greatest portion in my pack. But it was prayer and
reading my bible that kept me conscious and a knowledge that I’d survive.
I realize I’m sharing with you one of my seasons. This is not the direction I had in mind when I typed the 1st two lines of this discussion. So along with you we will see where this leads. It is my theory that after many years of medicine and therapy, what was transpiring in my life wasn’t being addressed. Again, this is my conclusion, so please don’t stop what you are doing and appears to be working for you. We are different individuals with different circumstances. Food for thought!
With that being expressed, after many years of medication and therapy which to no avail accomplished little. And honestly, deep down I knew I wasn’t any better. I suppose I was getting medication for pain for the body which only gave temporary or no relief. But when the pain is from a broken spirit or a wounded soul, there is no medicine that will heal that. We have our spirit, soul and body each depending on each other and upholding “the whole” as we walk on our earthly pilgrimage. One part of us lets the other parts know when something is wrong. I recall going to a therapist and on our second appointment; he started crying, stating
he didn’t know how to help me. And if he felt this, how was I supposed to feel? In a word, I simply felt lost!
I discovered a medication that healed me and I have been free for decades. The medication I took was a spiritual medicine called “Forgiveness”. It’s often said, Forgiveness is not for the one you are directing it to, but for you. I believe this saying with all my heart. While looking through one of my journals I found I had written “Forgiveness keeps you from repeating what has happened in your life.” Some may say “you don’t know what I have been through.” This is very true, but the tighter you hold on to it, the pain will build inside of you. The decision is yours to either continue to walk out someone else’s pain or walk away from someone else’s pain.
Our life comes in seasons or stages, and we must know how to dress for the time we’ve entered. Fall is the current season we are in, followed by winter, then spring and summer each requiring different clothing. There are seasons requiring air conditioning for a time, and then we turn on the heat. Household bills increase and decrease according to the season. Daylight is longer or shorter because of those different seasons. There are signs around us when it’s time to change. You don’t go out in the snow in a swimsuit. You can’t be encumbering in the wintertime of your soul wearing hate, not forgiving, exhibiting spiteful behavior or getting even. When hurting, you rarely felt that additional/compounding pain.
I have mentioned in past discussions; I worked as a counselor at a private psychiatric clinic for 8 years (don’t you just love God’s sense of humor). While there I mostly worked on the Adult Open Unit, but it was the Adult Closed Unit that showed me the way to hope. When working on the Closed Unit, each person had their own personal testimony of what someone had done to them. Then they say how he or she walks around as “if they did nothing to me.” This unfortunately is the case often. The perpetrator(s) continues to live out their life in some form acting oblivious to the damage they caused someone else.
I asked not to work on both the Adult and Teen Closed Units. I wasn’t a good person to work on either unit, because I cried as hard as the patients did (which made me think of the crying therapist I mentioned before). I wouldn’t minimize no one’s life journey. Nevertheless, I am a true witness; you can walk away from the pain and be free. The choice is in your hands, not theirs. We have to be conscious of the seasons of our life and dress appropriately within. Again I say, the decision is yours to continue to walk out someone else’s pain or walk away from someone else’s pain.
I have attached two songs from my emergency pack below. Click the Links. Enjoy.
Thank you for joining me for Friday at Sundown. Remember… Just Breathe!
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